More than Romance, We Just Need People

I recently received a testimonial that brought me to tears.  It reinforced my conviction about the vital need for human connection and also the importance of stepping beyond our comfort zone.  I created this website to facilitate stories like this.  I’ll include it here (with names changed).  Its power is self-evident.

Its been a while since I’ve logged on, but I think about NLL pretty much daily.

The site hasn’t brought me the love of my life (yet?) but has been instrumental in some really good friendships.

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Movie Review: Split

I just watched the film “Split” on DVD fully expecting it to be another insensitive Hollywood swipe at depicting mental illness.  I emerged with mixed feelings.  The film abides by a familiar abduction plot, cute teenage girls locked away in some basement dungeon with a deranged warden and complicated motives.  M. Night Shyamalan (wrote and directed the film) is known for injecting a sense of unease and a bit of twisted suspense in his films.  He does put his personal stamp on this one but the plotting is fairly standard.  What distinguishes “Split” is our villain—a man with a serious mental illness.  The trained eye easily diagnoses Dissociative Identity Disorder, however an explicit classification doesn’t come until near the end of the film.

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Making the case…

The question I get asked most often regarding Nolongerlonely (other than why haven’t I
found a wife on the site yet) is whether it is a good idea to pair together two people with a mental
illness. The arguments/hesitations usually fall along two separate lines of thinking: one that
envisions an emotional Armageddon and another that foments eugenic reasoning. Whether the
perceived problem is in the neuropathways of the brain or in the genetic code, both objections
reflect a cynical outlook that doesn’t take into account the benefits of a relationship with the
common underpinning of a psychiatric diagnosis.

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Where I’m at…

So my last (first) blog post gave the barebones of my personal journey of recovery and
my evolving assessments of what principal ingredients provided the spark. I’m still learning the
“art” of blogging but feedback from others have stressed the need to understand and “reach” my
audience. The identity of my audience will evolve (comments are always welcome) as will my
ability to be open and vulnerable in my writing. What I think sets me apart is my personal story.


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My bread crumbs…

It took me a while but I eventually bought in to the sick brain narrative.  It was expensive getting there.  My initial (and only) psych hospitalization was somehow paid for with money left over from my college fund.  We’re talking six figures—money dealing that would put Oliver North to shame.  My delusions were so ingrained that those seven weeks were one long joke–soon I’d be exonerated even celebrated as the truth would be revealed to all.  Each morning I dovetailed to the New York Times expecting to see something on the front page.  This was a month before Election Day 1992 and the revelations of my convoluted family history could sway the result.  I was living a Tom Clancy novel.  It was actually kind of fun.

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